Well Read

Well Bred?
By Just Add Kids Founder, Paula Herrmann

Ha! That’s what I thought!
Made some interesting observations as of late. Maybe my conclusions have been consistent with other musings I’ve had and have verbalized here or there (likely, Facebook).
When the thought occurred to me to chat about the ungratefulness and entitled generation we’re raising, never did I think I’d have to include me own kiddos in the conversation. Read More…
Yet, I shake my head in disbelief.
I’m not going to share the long drawn out story here, as I have verbalized my version of the series of unfortunate events that unfolded in my home within the last 24-36 hours (and further back, I fear) to 4 people today (one of my best friends, my nail tech, my chiropractor, and my husband). Each successive version gets longer (well, ‘cept my chiropractor, as my appointment didn’t allow, lucky her!) and I try to limit my word count here.  So in a nutshell, here goes…
My kids (and sadly, most of their friends) are ungrateful. Okay, I said it! Anything new here moms? Dads? Grandparents?
I say this, and it’s not just the lack of appreciation, many times verbalized with the words “Thank You”, it’s that sense of entitlement that goes along with the territory.
I KNOW I say “Thank You” all of the time.  I say “Thank You” when the recipient of the TY doesn’t really deserve it, yet they’ve provided me with a service. Great example: shopping/checking out at the Boston Store several times over the last couple of weeks. I used to be a manager there, years ago, yet, I know the emphasis they put on customer service. Heck, if you look at their cash register, it says “CUSTOMER FIRST” on their screen. Sadly, I think just like all of us, if something is in front of us all of the time, it looses it’s impact. Have I been provided with even “good” customer service? Well, if I consider the young tall man who finally found the Dept 56 boxes to 3 display items I needed to buy. Yup, he found the boxes alright and boxed them. After, lady #1 couldn’t find them, shoved me off on some lady named Joyce “over in that department” who wasn’t there, he did. But boy oh boy did his body language let me know he really wasn’t pleased with my request. Sadly, I was the one who said “Thank You” each and every time I checked out there, which must’ve numbered 8 times? recently.  Not a one thanked me first.
I try to think back to when I was a kid. Why am I so conscious of being and verbalizing my sincere “thanks”?…and IT IS sincere. (Okay, well maybe on a few occasions, I’ve been a bit sarcastic.  That would be with sound reason.) Giving thanks was instilled in me by my parents. I, along with 3 siblings, were always reminded to: thank someone for a ride home, thank someone for having me over, thank someone for a gift, thank someone for dinner, thank someone for saying “God bless you” when I sneeze, whatever, whenever it’s appropriate. My dad insisted that we children thanked my mom for each meal she prepared and served us. And we did. Or, we got a firm reminder that we had better do so.
Circle back to the Herrmann household yesterday: I paid for and delivered a group of girls (3 daughters, #2’s three friends, and my niece) to the movie theater; surprised #2 (and the balance of the moviegoers) with light decor in celebration of her belated birthday, sleepover festivities begin afterall, this was arranged as such (birthday sleepover); as part of the decor, table was set and food was being prepared and then served; guess who did all of the clean up? (okay, I can overlook that it was a party of sorts, yet it’s important to note); went to bed early in hopes of waking up early to work (on calendar, weekly e-newsletter, and this blog!) didn’t happen: instead I got yelled at by #2 for sonny boy (younger brother) not leaving the group to go to bed 3x, then an hour or so later, got yelled at, again #2 for #3’s unwelcomed, extended intrusion into sister’s sleepover. Everyone, including me sleeps in. As discussed the night before, I planned on making a breakfast for all at 10am.  That, my friends, was a 2+ hour event from meal prep, table setting, serving….I was pooped and needing to make my noon nail appointment. I declared the action plan for my kids during the next 2.5-3 hours of my absence (said nail and chiropractic appointments), that which included #2’s participation in breakfast dishes clean up.  I made sure I let the group know I was leaving thinking maybe at that point, I’d get at least one “Thank you, mom”, “Thank you, Mrs. Herrmann”.  Um, not so much.
When I arrived home, our guests were gone. #2 had done her rendition of clean up in the kitchen, yet left the family room (her sleepover hub) a disaster. At the time which I addressed the mess with her, her friends had been gone for 3 hours. Ample time sista to restore the family room SHE worked so hard to make presentable for her friends.
Yes, I know I am being hard on them. I am sure #2 was very tired as she shared with me that they did not get to sleep until 4am. I really am not so much upset that the room wasn’t completely put back together. It was that sense of mom works her tail off to make it all happen, and not a one person peeps a little verbal “thanks”. Really? That kills me! Not because I am wiped out, bent over backwards, whatever…I am so freakin’ used to that, it comes with the territory.  That there is no gratitude expressed from the recipient(s) of that gift, if you will. Not this time, and as I think back on the thousands of other situations/experiences, the same rings true. These are my ungrateful kids. What the heck?
Side note: In the scheme of things, my husband and I have raised good kids. Yet in retrospect, it appears we have some work to do.
Side note/side note: I quite delight in shopping at Best Buy and Office Depot, neighboring stores in Racine. Is there something in the water in that strip mall? Those employees at both places…pleasant and EXCELLENT customer service!
Side note/side note/side note: As I was blabbing to my nail tech about my sad sad situation, she told me about this picture going around online. Of course, it fits right in with my blog theme of ungratefulness. Enjoy??…
ungrateful pic


These parents are my super heros! There needs to be consequences to our kids sense of entitlement and lack of appreciation. Job well done, Max’s parents!


2 Responses so far »

  1. 1

    Mollie said,

    My six year old went to bed crying Christmas night… He’d received an iPod touch …. Among other great gifts… Cried because he didn’t want to go to bed and yelled at me “this is the worst Christmas Ever! I sure understand and sympathize…

  2. 2

    […] week, I blogged about the ungrateful and entitled generation of kids we seem to be raising in  “Well Bred?”. The week before that, it was in regards to my 10 year old daughter’s Christmas list, where […]

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